Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
