So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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