i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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