just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
