even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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