I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
