I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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