If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Randomize
