I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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