I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
