"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
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