Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
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