I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
