careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
