My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Randomize
