chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Randomize