I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
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