She is in my trunk
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
