so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
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