Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
this boner is exhausting
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Randomize
