bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
