? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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