im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize
