Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Randomize