HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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