Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
