the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize