no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
