i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
