google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize