Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
