She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Randomize
