all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Dick very happy bro
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
