Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize
