the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
