And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
It's just like the Real World with babies
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize
