week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Randomize
