i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
