Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Randomize
