yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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