Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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