I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
