Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I don't deserve a penis
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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