Ambien. No doubt about it.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize