i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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