I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Randomize
