Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
