Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
God I need to hump something, right now.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
