a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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