how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize
